Watch It (or Read It) Before You Knock It!

I’m going to make some enemies here. When The Descent: Part 2 first came out, everyone was sure it would suck. “The spelunkers all died under that cave-in,” they said, sure they were right. They even had me believing it would suck. But did they see it? I did, and not only was it plausible, but also it was brutal, and terrific. I know, I make you sick. Get sicker, and rent the film.




Think about it. The bat things, called “crawlers,” would starve if they just waited for spelunkers to get trapped under cave-ins. It doesn’t happen that often. Therefore, of course someone above would be feeding them animals in a hole in the ground that leads to their dwelling, that someone probably a Satanist who thinks he’s nourishing demons. And, sure, there could be a mine shaft, and the sheriff and the female deputy could force Sarah back underground, thinking she’s responsible for the deaths of her friends . . . and to look for bodies.


In one scene, the deputy is trapped in a cell of falling rocks, and one of the crawlers tries digging underneath the pile so it can eat her, but a huge rock falls and crushes its head. Smush! In another scene, Sarah and the deputy fall into a stinky pool . . . with crusty piles. Then a crawler sticks his ass over the pool and takes a crap. They’re in their toilet! Both scenes, swear to God, were worth the “price” of admission. Having a free month of Amazon Prime when I bought my first Kindle Fire helped, I admit.




The same thing’s true of fiction books. I read Twilight to make sure it sucked. Stephenie Meyer used way too many weak, to-be verbs like “was,” the first thing a writer learns not to do, and went on and on about a truck Bella’s dad was going to buy for her instead of just getting to the scene where Edward, with supernatural strength, saves her life in a traffic accident.


Now I’m hearing there will be The Descent: Part 3. I’ll have to see it.


You can go back to your sanity now.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Subscribe to My Newsletter and Get a Free Copy of The Not
Email Marketing You Can Trust