Uncategorized

Get Ready for My Horror Audio Books!

Anybody excited about my books will be glad to know that all three novels and the one novella will be out as audio books soon, available to purchase through Audible or iTunes. I know I can’t wait!

 

Unfortunately–or fortunately, if you’re of my point of view–the short-story books won’t be audio books, just as they weren’t made in to paper. Why? For some reason, I got rid of the Microsoft Word versions of my short-story books, and you need Word to make it into two panels for a paper book. And, similarly, you need Word copies to give the auditioning audio-book reader a sample of what to say and how to say it.

 

I’m pretty sure Horrorbook is my best seller, so I don’t want to diss the short-story books, but…well…my first book was Horrorbook, and I didn’t know I wasn’t getting a pre-made cover, ’cause I’d already contracted with the guy. So I got a demon with a hook, even though none of the stories has a demon with a hook. Ugh! With Insanity, the second book and short-story collection, I was going to call it Pieces of Meat, then wanted to change the title and have a guy breaking through glass, so the cover has a crazy-looking dude bashing through glass–no, those are ice cubes, cause they were going to be pieces of meat–wait…what?! Then there was the foreward where I talked about the current horror scene being a joke, the way most great tales don’t get published. That may be true, but sometimes it’s just better to shut your mouth. Anyway, you get the idea. I’m not proud of my first two books. But I stand behind the horror stories inside. Unfuckable, as in not possible to fuck ’em up.

 

Back to the audio books: All four should be out by the end of the year, so enjoy!

Super-Heavy List, Revised Yet Again

I discovered this unbelievably-heavy group called Antaeus, so here I go again with a revision.

 

Hopefully this is the last one.

 

1. Reek of Putrefaction – Carcass

2. Bloodcurdling Tool of Digestion – Exhumer

3. Deicide Deicide

4. Pander Division Marduk – Marduk

5. De Principii Evangelikum – Antaeus

6. Blood Libels – Antaeus

7. Cut Your Flesh and Worship Satan – Antaeus

8. House by the Cemetery – Mortician

9. Mortal Massacre – Mortician

10. Gore Metal – Exhumed

11. Slaughtercult – Exhumed

12. Church of the Five Precious Wounds – Repulsive Dissection

13. Cut Open the Aberration – Repulsive Dissection

14. Generation of Hate/Mutilation of God – Dismembered Fetus

15. Blood Past – Sinister

16. Feasting on Blood – Severe Torture

17. Misanthropic Carnage – Severe Torture

18. Dechristianize – Vital remains

19. Icons of Evil – Vital Remains

20. Sons of Northern Darkness – Immortal

 

Band list:

Sinister

Mortician

Gorgasm

Immortal

Suffocation

Enslaved (only Enslaved, Frost, Eld, and Blodhemn)

Exhumed (only Gore Metal and Slaughtercult)

Repulsive Dissection

Malignancy

Dismembered Fetus

Necrophagia

Exhumer

Severe Torture (nothing after Misanthropic Carnage)

Abscess (everything but Seminal Vampires and Maggot Men)

The Ravenous

Dying Fetus

Marduk

Thornspawn

Cannibal Corpse

Hypocrisy (only Penetralia and Osculum Obscenum)

Withered Earth (only Of Which They Bleed)

Lust of Decay

Avulsed

Pig Destroyer

Circle of Dead Children

Inhume

Vader (only The Ultimate Incantation)

Deicide (only Amon: Feasting the Beast, Deicide, Legion, Once Upon the Cross, Insineratehymn, In Torment in Hell and The Stench of Redemption)

Laceration

Impending Doom (only Nailed. Dead. Risen.)

Crimson Thorn (only Unearthed and Dissection)

Macabre

 

The Fast and the Furious? (It’s Supposed to be a Movie.)

Continue reading

Go Multi-Genre, a Good Idea for Any Writer

In late November, I realized that I’ve been a full-time author for ten years. So why the hell am I just learning it’s necessary to be a multi-genre writer? Let’s face it, horror doesn’t sell anymore, and it’s time to thrive instead of just survive.

 

I’m sure that, somewhere out there, an author exists who likes his job and doesn’t mind writing horror for the love, or for accolades from the Horror Writer’s Association. But there can’t be that many of them. An author has a right to be paid for his hard work. And if there are writers fearing they’ll be labeled as sellouts, one can always use a pseudonym–though this may not be a long-term solution. But writing other genres can not only double the fun, but also the friends (fans). In the end, you’ll be more well-rounded.

 

Still, why would anybody love a job, especially having to get up in the morning? Whatever floats your boat, but I’m an insomniac. It takes me a long time to get to sleep at night. I’ve got to sleep in.

 

One can always write at night.

Super-Heavy List, Revised

This latest revision is a “Duh” moment. I can’t believe I left out the second and third Cannibal Corpse albums, as few CDs are as crazy as these.

 

I also take back what I said about demos being better than signed albums. That’s not always the case.

 

1. Reek of Putrefaction – Carcass

2. Bloodcurdling Tool of Digestion – Exhumer

3. Deicide Deicide

4. House by the Cemetery – Mortician

5. Mortal Massacre – Mortician

6. Gore Metal – Exhumed

7. Slaughtercult – Exhumed

8. Church of the Five Precious Wounds – Repulsive Dissection

9. Cut Open the Aberration – Repulsive Dissection

10. Panzer Division Marduk – Marduk

11. Generation of Hate/Mutilation of God – Dismembered Fetus

12. Blood Past – Sinister

13. Butchered at Birth – Cannibal Corpse

14. Tomb of the Mutilated – Cannibal Corpse

15. Feasting on Blood – Severe Torture

16. Misanthropic Carnage – Severe Torture

17. Dechristianize – Vital remains

18. Icons of Evil – Vital Remains

19. Sons of Northern Darkness – Immortal

20. …Of the Dark Light – Suffocation

 

Band list:

Sinister

Mortician

Gorgasm

Immortal

Suffocation

Enslaved (only Enslaved, Frost, Eld, and Blodhemn)

Exhumed (only Gore Metal and Slaughtercult)

Repulsive Dissection

Malignancy

Dismembered Fetus

Necrophagia

Exhumer

Severe Torture (nothing after Misanthropic Carnage)

Abscess (everything but Seminal Vampires and Maggot Men)

The Ravenous

Dying Fetus

Marduk

Thornspawn

Cannibal Corpse

Hypocrisy (only Penetralia and Osculum Obscenum)

Withered Earth (only Of Which They Bleed)

Lust of Decay

Avulsed

Pig Destroyer

Circle of Dead Children

Inhume

Vader (only The Ultimate Incantation)

Deicide (only Amon: Feasting the Beast, Deicide, Legion, Once Upon the Cross, Insineratehymn, In Torment in Hell and The Stench of Redemption)

Laceration

Impending Doom (only Nailed. Dead. Risen.)

Crimson Thorn (only Unearthed and Dissection)

Macabre

 

Super-Heavy List (Final, I Hope)

I’ve been finding out, lately–though I’ve always known–that when a death-metal band gets a recording contract, it sucks all the life out of them. Listen to the beyond-brutal cacophony of Deicide’s and Sinister’s demos and see what I mean. Hopefully, this is the last edit of my super-heavy list.

 

Post-Post Note-I realized in retrospect that Deicide’s first album is heavier than their demo and deserves the third-place rank on the list.

 

1. Reek of Putrefaction – Carcass

2. Bloodcurdling Tool of Digestion – Exhumer

3. Deicide Deicide

4. House by the Cemetery – Mortician

5. Mortal Massacre – Mortician

6. Gore Metal – Exhumed

7. Slaughtercult – Exhumed

8. Church of the Five Precious Wounds – Repulsive Dissection

9. Cut Open the Aberration – Repulsive Dissection

10. Panzer Division Marduk – Marduk

11. Generation of Hate/Mutilation of God – Dismembered Fetus

12. Blood Past – Sinister

13. Wrath of War – Thornspawn

14. Sanctified by Satan’s Blood – Thornspawn

15. Feasting on Blood – Severe Torture

16. Misanthropic Carnage – Severe Torture

17. Dechristianize – Vital remains

18. Icons of Evil – Vital Remains

19. Sons of Northern Darkness – Immortal

20. …Of the Dark Light – Suffocation

 

Band list:

Sinister

Mortician

Gorgasm

Immortal

Suffocation

Enslaved (only Enslaved, Frost, Eld, and Blodhemn)

Exhumed (only Gore Metal and Slaughtercult)

Repulsive Dissection

Malignancy

Dismembered Fetus

Necrophagia

Exhumer

Severe Torture (nothing after Misanthropic Carnage)

Abscess (everything but Seminal Vampires and Maggot Men)

The Ravenous

Dying Fetus

Marduk

Thornspawn

Cannibal Corpse

Hypocrisy (only Penetralia and Osculum Obscenum)

Withered Earth (only Of Which They Bleed)

Lust of Decay

Avulsed

Pig Destroyer

Circle of Dead Children

Inhume

Vader (only The Ultimate Incantation)

Deicide (only Amon: Feasting the Beast, Deicide, Legion, Once Upon the Cross, Insineratehymn, In Torment in Hell and The Stench of Redemption)

Laceration

Impending Doom (only Nailed. Dead. Risen.)

Crimson Thorn (only Unearthed and Dissection)

Macabre

My New Novella, 66SICK, Is Out!

This is one of my most insidious tales yet, a novella at 149 pages–almost as long as my favorite novel, Rosemary’s Baby! You can pre-order the eBook for .99¢, or if you can’t wait till Halloween, order the paperback for $5 NOW, $10.41 with shipping and handling. Enjoy!

Super-Heavy List Re-Re-Re-Re-Re-Revised

I’ve been singing the praises of the new Suffocation album, …Of the Dark Light, all over the internet, and I’ve realized it’s better than Vader’s first album–namely heavier–so I’ve replaced it. Bands like Suffocation, who get better with age, are a happy accident. Here goes:

 

1. Reek of Putrefaction – Carcass

2. Bloodcurdling Tool of Digestion – Exhumer

3. Amon: Feasting the Beast – Deicide

4. House by the Cemetery – Mortician

5. Mortal Massacre – Mortician

6. Gore Metal – Exhumed

7. Slaughtercult – Exhumed

8. Church of the Five Precious Wounds – Repulsive Dissection

9. Cut Open the Aberration – Repulsive Dissection

10. Panzer Division Marduk – Marduk

11. Generation of Hate/Mutilation of God – Dismembered Fetus

12. Blood Past – Sinister

13. Wrath of War – Thornspawn

14. Sanctified by Satan’s Blood – Thornspawn

15. Feasting on Blood – Severe Torture

16. Misanthropic Carnage – Severe Torture

17. Dechristianize – Vital remains

18. Icons of Evil – Vital Remains

19. Sons of Northern Darkness – Immortal

20. …Of the Dark Light – Suffocation

 

Band list:

Sinister

Mortician

Gorgasm

Immortal

Suffocation

Enslaved (only Enslaved, Frost, Eld, and Blodhemn)

Exhumed (only Gore Metal and Slaughtercult)

Repulsive Dissection

Malignancy

Dismembered Fetus

Necrophagia

Exhumer

Severe Torture (nothing after Misanthropic Carnage)

Abscess (everything but Seminal Vampires and Maggot Men)

The Ravenous

Dying Fetus

Marduk

Thornspawn

Cannibal Corpse

Hypocrisy (only Penetralia and Osculum Obscenum)

Withered Earth (only Of Which They Bleed)

Lust of Decay

Avulsed

Pig Destroyer

Circle of Dead Children

Inhume

Vader (only The Ultimate Incantation)

Deicide (only Amon: Feasting the Beast, Deicide, Legion, Once Upon the Cross, Insineratehymn, In Torment in Hell and The Stench of Redemption)

Laceration

Impending Doom (only Nailed. Dead. Risen.)

Crimson Thorn (only Unearthed and Dissection)

 

You Might Have to Write in Other Genres

For those who haven’t figured this out yet–many authors already write in other genres–one must summon up a great deal of courage to admit that one will never make it writing horror. And by “making it” I mean earning a decent profit. Let’s face it: except for the lucky few, horror doesn’t sell anymore. Ask any literary agent. It’s not the ’80s, and you’re not an author if nobody cares, or if you only have one fan (like me).

 

The obvious solution: write in a genre that sells. You could learn the craft of writing sci-fi or fantasy, or you could assimilate the trade of literary fiction. There’s always non-fiction freelance as a way of making money till your horror ship comes in, if it ever does. Too, one could admit one just isn’t that good of a writer and switch to the young-adult genre. Teens are easier to please than adults. Tots are even easier to please–you could write children’s books. (I grew up loving Curious George.)

 

You can bet I’m writing a novel in another genre–although I don’t want to give it away yet–because I’m tired of swimming in bugs in my ghetto. Even though the landlord got Orkin to get rid of my ‘roaches and bedbugs, I suffered with them for quite some time, and it happened. All it takes is a nasty neighbor moving in, even if your landlord uses pest control.

 

Finally, to all those writers who refuse to give up the integrity of being a good, original horror author, I hope you have a well-paying day job you like and don’t want to become wealthy, or I hope you like living with all kinds of critters!

Super-Heavy List Re-Re-Re-Re-Revised

Gahhhh! I had to edit this list again. I can’t believe I forgot Immortal and Vital Remains with Glen Benton! So here we go again, the 20 heaviest albums ever, and a list of the groups that belong in this conversion:

 

1. Reek of Putrefaction – Carcass

2. Bloodcurdling Tool of Digestion – Exhumer

3. Deicide – Deicide

4. House by the Cemetery – Mortician

5. Mortal Massacre – Mortician

6. Gore Metal – Exhumed

7. Slaughtercult – Exhumed

8. Church of the Five Precious Wounds – Repulsive Dissection

9. Cut Open the Aberration – Repulsive Dissection

10. Panzer Division Marduk – Marduk

11. Generation of Hate/Mutilation of God – Dismembered Fetus

12. Cross Species Transmutation – Malignancy

13. Wrath of War – Thornspawn

14. Sanctified by Satan’s Blood – Thornspawn

15. Feasting on Blood – Severe Torture

16. Misanthropic Carnage – Severe Torture

17. Dechristianize – Vital remains

18. Icons of Evil – Vital Remains

19. Sons of Northern Darkness – Immortal

20. The Ultimate Incantation – Vader

 

Band list:

 

Mortician

Immortal

Enslaved (only Enslaved, Frost, Eld, and Blodhemn)

Exhumed (only Gore Metal and Slaughtercult)

Repulsive Dissection

Malignancy

Dismembered Fetus

Necrophagia

Exhumer

Severe Torture (nothing after Misanthropic Carnage)

Abscess (everything but Seminal Vampires and Maggot Men)

The Ravenous

Dying Fetus

Marduk

Thornspawn

Cannibal Corpse

Hypocrisy (only Penetralia and Osculum Obscenum)

Withered Earth (only Of Which They Bleed)

Lust of Decay

Avulsed

Pig Destroyer

Circle of Dead Children

Inhume

Vader (only The Ultimate Incantation)

Deicide (only Deicide, Legion, Once Upon the Cross, Insineratehymn, In Torment in Hell and The Stench of Redemption)

Laceration

Impending Doom (only Nailed. Dead. Risen.)

Crimson Thorn (only Unearthed and Dissection)

 

Facebook

Subscribe to My Newsletter and Get a Free Copy of The Not

Email Marketing You Can Trust