Not Heavy, but Super-Heavy (Revised Again)

I’ve been posting about how regular death metal isn’t shocking me anymore and how I’ve gone super-heavy. Yet as I look back on it, I forgot some key albums, and half of these bands don’t do lead solos (it ought to be a law). So now I’m trying to phase out most of the bands that don’t do leads (some are just too brutal not to include), and I think I’ve got a better list this time. So here goes:

 

  1. Reek of Putrefaction – Carcass
  2. Deicide – Deicide
  3. House by the Cemetery – Mortician
  4. Mortal Massacre – Mortician
  5. Gore Metal – Exhumed
  6. Slaughtercult – Exhumed
  7. Church of the Five Precious Wounds – Repulsive Dissection
  8. Cut Open the Aberration – Repulsive Dissection
  9. Panzer Division Marduk – Marduk
  10. Generation of Hate – Dismembered Fetus
  11. Mutilation of God – Dismembered Fetus
  12. Feasting on Blood – Severe Torture
  13. Misanthropic Carnage – Severe Torture
  14. Infesting the Exhumed  – Lust of Decay
  15. The Ultimate Incantation – Vader
  16. Cross Species Transmutation – Malignancy
  17. Assembled in Blasphemy – The Ravenous
  18. Through the Cracks of Death – Abscess
  19. Wrath of War – Thornspawn
  20. Sanctified by Satan’s Blood – Thornspawn

 

Band list:

 

Mortician

Exhumed (nothing after Slaughtercult)

Repulsive Dissection

Malignancy

Dismembered Fetus

Necrophagia

Exhumer

Severe Torture (nothing after Misanthropic Carnage)

Abscess (everything but Seminal Vampires and Maggot Men)

The Ravenous

Dying Fetus

Marduk

Thornspawn

Cannibal Corpse

Slayer (only thrash band that didn’t sell out and go slow in the ’90s)

Insidious Torture

Withered Earth (only Of Which They Bleed)

Lust of Decay

Avulsed

Pig Destroyer

Circle of Dead Children

Inhume

Vader (only The Ultimate Incantation)

Deicide (only Deicide, Legion, and Once Upon the Cross)

Laceration

Impending Doom (only Nailed. Dead. Risen.)

Crimson Thorn (only Unearthed and Dissection)

 

NaNo or No?

There seem to be mixed opinions concerning whether going to nanowrimo.org and taking part in the 50,000 words in a month challenge is helpful in writing a good novel. I think both sides have their points, and I’m going to touch on them now.

 

When I first started with NaNo, I expected a lot more encouragement than I got, which was nil; I was on my own. Then to listen to the constant calls for donations and how every day’s a NaNo day got old quick. The one virtue I’ve found is that, if you’ve written a lot of novels like I have–the fact that you can only purchase three doesn’t mean I don’t have a dozen more rough drafts awaiting editing–you get to the point where it’s hard to make a novel long enough. You end up with all these novellas. And while that’s not a bad thing, too many novellas and not enough novels can be a problem, as the writing guidebooks say to write books if you ever want to make money at this game, not short-story books and not novellas. The challenge of hitting 50,000 words and getting a badge–you can always write more in December and hit the 80,000-word mark agents expect–and the nagging condemnation of failure if you don’t, does motivate me to write something book-length.

 

Not that I’m into it for the money–I hope to live comfortably, not get rich–but a writer should be compensated for his hard work.

 

I tried adding friends at NaNo on their Website, tried going to meetings in person in Peoria, Illinois, then endeavored to get some author fellowship with the local NaNoers in another site online, and every attempt failed, which may be because I’m that redheaded stepchild who writes horror. So I try to write everyday. Apparently, if you’re not Stephen King and Joe Hill, that’s impossible, but the days I do tap in–most days, actually–I make time to go on Nanowrimo.org and update my word count. It does make me feel like I’ve accomplished something.

 

But your story may be different. If so, why don’t you leave a comment. Or, if as many people are reading this as I think (zero), then don’t.

Is Regular Death Metal Dead?

Again, I’ve decided to share an assignment I wrote for Warriner’s Grammar and Composition, Book 3, though it’s about music. But death- and black-metal tuneage are about horror, so I think I can get away with putting it up here. I’m probably the only one who cares about the Super-Heavy List I’ve come up with since I’ve found out what’s really heavy–not that I look down on what’s just heavy; they’re killing it; there’s bands that kill it harder, though. The list means something to me, however. So, here goes:

 

Regular death metal isn’t good enough anymore; we’ve heard this album 2,000 times, and it no longer shocks. It was cool enough in the early ’90s, maybe. Guttural growls, blastbeats, speed-metal beats, and slower beats with double-bass drums–rinse and repeat–are yawn-inducing. Albums barely heavy enough bore the pummelized ears of seasoned death-metal fans. A death band that doesn’t try to outdo Reek of Putrefaction, Carcass’s first album and the heaviest album ever, aren’t doing their jobs. Whether or not they eclipse that possessed-sounding record is irrelevant (for they probably won’t). It’s the effort that matters.

 

Though both kinds are very fast, sinister, and are played by mean-looking musicians, one’s fresh; the other puts listeners to sleep. The bands need an extra gear or gears: cacophony vocals–both the guttural growl and the high-pitched growl-scream done at the same time–deathcore vox so low it sounds like the “singer” is whistling, or at least a timely balance between guttural vocals and high-pitched growl-screams. The band must also attack the instruments as if they were insane. Too, death-metal bands need to quit trying to be cute–with covers of “…Baby One More Time,” “Material Girl,” or Led Zeppelin covers (Zep’ are ashamed of being called “metal”)–and quit wearing three-piece suits. That’s why black-metal bands hate death metal. In the end, fans know which bands are hungry and which are phoning it in.

 

That said, behold the Super-Heavy List:

 

Mortician

Exhumed (only Gore Metal and Slaughtercult)

Repulsive Dissection (though half deathcore and half death metal)

Malignancy

Dismembered Fetus

Necrophagia (though they’re black metal)

Exhumer

Severe Torture

Abscess

The Ravenous

Dying Fetus

Marduk (also black metal)

Thornspawn (black metal, too)

Cannibal Corpse

Slayer (though they’re thrash)

Insidious Torture

Lust of Decay

Avulsed

Pig Destroyer (though they’re grindcore)

Circle of Dead Children (also grindcore)

Inhume

Vader (only The Ultimate Incantation)

Deicide (only Deicide, Legion, and Once Upon the Cross)

Laceration

 

Final answer: no, regular DM’s not dead (and WASP ain’t death; they’re a hair band). I have those albums–like the Broken Hope CDs–but they’re classics, and I’m a collector.

 

My 101 Scariest Moments (Revised)

I have a new favorite movie, so I decided to revamp my 101 list and put it up here. Killjoy of Necrophagia was totally right in my favorite metal video, Through the Eye of the Dead, that the late Lucio Fulci’s The Beyond rules. Plus, I’ve changed my mind about the second version of The Shining. It’s as good as the first. It doesn’t count as a remake because it’s truer to the book than the late Stanley Kubrick’s version. (Yes, I know he was a genius.) Danny Torrance’s vision of his dad gone crazy in the future, looking dead and holding that croquet mallet, is crazy as a bedbug, and the hedge animals are just creepy. So here goes:

 

  1. The Beyond
  2. The Innkeepers
  3. The Shining (either version)
  4. Megan Is Missing
  5. The Ring
  6. The Exorcist
  7. Jaws
  8. The Evil Dead
  9. The Spell
  10. The Lost
  11. The Night Flier
  12. Inside
  13. Carrie (original version)
  14. Ginger Snaps
  15. The Last Horror Movie
  16. Night of the Living Dead
  17. Triangle
  18. The Last House on the Left (original version)
  19. The Girl Next Door (Jack Ketchum version)
  20. The Serpent and the Rainbow
  21. Phantasm
  22. An American Werewolf in London
  23. The Exorcist III
  24. The Howling
  25. One Dark Night
  26. Pet Sematary
  27. Let the Right One In
  28. Dracula (Francis Ford Coppola’s version)
  29. The Wicker Man (original version)
  30. Lake Mungo
  31. Salem’s Lot
  32. Alien
  33. The Devil’s Advocate
  34. Annabelle
  35. Faces of Death 4
  36. Tales From the Hood
  37. The Omen (original version)
  38. From Dusk Till Dawn
  39. Scanners
  40. The Craft
  41. I Spit on Your Grave (original version)
  42. Alice Sweet Alice
  43. Mother’s Day (original version)
  44. The Descent
  45. Killer Party
  46. The Thing (John Carpenter’s version)
  47. The Other
  48. Halloween (original version)
  49. Jeepers Creepers
  50. Wrong Turn
  51. The Amityville Horror (original version)
  52. A Nightmare on Elm Street (original version)
  53. Cujo
  54. Grave Encounters
  55. House of 1000 Corpses
  56. The Dead Zone
  57. The Mist
  58. The Servants of Twilight
  59. American Mary
  60. Dark House
  61. The Rapture
  62. Sliver
  63. Rosemary’s Baby (original version)
  64. They Live
  65. Re-Animator
  66. Dagon
  67. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre
  68. Frailty
  69. Uzumaki
  70. The Birds
  71. Psycho
  72. Children of the Corn
  73. The Sentinel (1977)
  74. Species
  75. The Demonic Toys
  76. Piranha (original version)
  77. Hostel
  78. The Conjuring
  79. When a Stranger Calls (original version)
  80. Natural Born Killers
  81. Freaks
  82. The Haunting of Julia
  83. House on Haunted Hill (original version)
  84. May
  85. Insidious
  86. Drag Me to Hell
  87. The Possession
  88. Poltergeist
  89. Wait Until Dark
  90. Trilogy of Terror
  91. It’s Alive
  92. The Unborn (original version)
  93. Audition
  94. Demons
  95. The Brood
  96. The Hills Have Eyes (original version)
  97. Frost
  98. The Silence of the Lambs
  99. Ed Gein (2000)
  100. The Sixth Sense
  101. The Entity

 

 

Not Heavy, but Super-Heavy

Since my favorite types of music, death/black/thrash metal, grindcore, deathcore and hardcore have lyrics about horror, I thought it would be fun to blog about it. You see, I used to think I knew what was heavy, like Carcass and Nile–and I’m not saying they’re not killing it; other bands kill it harder, though–but I’ve come to discover what’s really heavy. Well, all right, those bands are heavy, but super-heavy. It’s just better. I mean, when’s the last time Carcass sounded like Reek of Putrefaction, and when’s the last time Nile has sounded like In Their Darkened Shrines or Black Seeds of Vengeance? So here’s my new list of favorite albums:

 

  1. Reek of Putrefaction – Carcass
  2. House by the Cemetery – Mortician
  3. Mortal Massacre – Mortician
  4. Chainsaw Dismemberment – Mortician
  5. Darkest Day of Horror – Mortician
  6. Domain of Death – Mortician
  7. Hacked up for Barbecue – Mortician
  8. Gore Metal – Exhumed
  9. Slaughtercult – Exhumed
  10. Panzer Division Marduk – Marduk
  11. Church of the Five Precious Wounds – Repulsive Dissection
  12. Cut Open the Aberration – Repulsive Dissection
  13. Assembled in Blasphemy – The Ravenous
  14. Through the Cracks of Death – Abscess
  15. Wrath of War – Thornspawn
  16. Sanctified by Satan’s Blood – Thornspawn
  17. Cross Species Transmutation – Malignancy
  18. Generation of Hate/Mutilation of God– Dismembered Fetus
  19. Season of the Dead– Necrophagia
  20. The Divine Art of Torture – Necrophagia

 

Death metal should scare you. If it bores you or puts you to sleep, you’re listening to the wrong groups.

Black Metal: Music of the Possessed

I’ve been sharing my paragraph assignments from Warriner’s Grammar and Composition, Book 3, and this one’s about black metal, which I’ve been listening to more than any other type of music lately. Thankfully, I’ve discovered BM bands that play like death-metal bands, without the clean vocals and keeping the keyboards to a minimum: Immortal, Marduk, Absu, and Thornspawn to name a few. Here goes:

 

Black metal represents possessed people in look, sound, and attitude. The vocals are pattered after how Regan MacNeil sounded when possessed by the devil in the horror flick, The Exorcist. The corpsepaint the musicians wear resembles the hideous face of Satan that keeps flashing on the screen in the uncut version of The Exorcist. Moreover, The black-metal artists’ hatred of Christ is identical to possessed Regan’s. Therefore, their actions confirm them as being possessed by the devil. First, when Dead of Mayhem blew his brains out, the other musicians, when they found him, decided to take a picture and use it for an album cover instead of calling the police. Then, when a McDonald’s opened in Oslo in Norway, the musicians shot at the business late at night in an effort to start World War III. And black-metal musicians have been known to burn down churches–even if landmarks. BM band members and fans of the Norwegian music committed over fifty arsons of Christian churches from 1992 to 1996. For example, Burzum genius Varg Vikernes was convicted of four church burnings; Samoth of Emperor got sixteen months in jail for church arson; Faust of Emperor, Vikernes, and Euronymous of Mayhem tried to bomb a church, but it didn’t detonate, so they burned the building to the ground. Some of the bands call death metal commercial and use the crappiest equipment possible to come off as being brutaler than anyone else. Finally, in all these ways, they prove black metal is more the devil’s music than any other kind.

 

Perfect: Nadia Comaneci, Alien or Human?

In commemoration of the Rio Olympics, I thought I’d share a writing exercise I wrote for Warriner’s Grammar and Composition, Third Course. The paragraph is about Nadia Comaneci, who at the 1976 Montreal Olympics was perfect more than once. It doesn’t have anything to do with horror, unless you muse over how human beings can’t be perfect; then I guess it could be a sci-horror paragraph about Nadia being an alien. But she wasn’t an alien, so that doesn’t work. Anyway, if you’re a fan of the Olympics-which is a hell of a lot better than watching my baseball team, the Chicago White Sox, lose and lose and lose again–you should enjoy this. It may mean nothing to most people, but when I watched her steal the show in ’76, I was so in love with her when I was thirteen. On an interesting side note, the scoreboard manufacturers were told an athlete getting a perfect score was impossible, so they scored her 1.00 instead of 10.00, at the Olympics and the competitions before the Olympics. Here we go:

 

The Romanian gymnast Nadia Comaneci is the best female Olympic athlete ever. She garnered a perfect score at the tender age of fourteen and earned eight perfect scores in all. She had to do that, for the Russian judges were prejudiced against Romanians back then. Therefore, it was the only way Nadia could win. She won three gold medals in Montreal in 1976, then two more in the 1980 Olympics in Moscow. Over the Olympics, world championships, European championships, and summer university games, Nadia won twenty-one gold medals, seven silvers, and two bronzes. The Olympic gold medals were for the balance beam–twice–uneven bars, floor exercise, and all-around. Only Mary Lou Retton was perfect again, for that’s supposed to be impossible for humans. No one did it as much as Nadia, however–not inhuman, but insanely talented.

Great, Free Horror eBooks

Admit it, great books are hard to find in any genre, but especially horror–thanks to all the “authors” way-past-overdoing vampires and zombies–and if you do find them, you’ll probably have to pay too much, as is the case with any recent eBook by Stephen King or Joe Hill. Over ten dollars for a digital book is just greedy and unfair. Therefore, let me make it easier for you to find great, affordable horror.

 

Nobody knows better than me how hard it is to not only find a great horror novel, but also to come across the rare jewel of an excellent horror film that, holy crap and miracle, actually scares you (Holidays, V/H/S). In past posts, I’ve made it easier to find great horror movies. Now I’m going to fill you in on the terrific free horror novels. It’s common knowledge that most of the books by the olden-day horror authors are free (unless you want a good cover), i.e. Lovecraft, Shelley, Poe, Blackwood, James (M.R.), James (Henry), Stoker, and Le Fanu, so I won’t list those. Just the modern ones.

 

The Familiar–Benjamin A. Sawyer (This one draws you in with great characters.)

 

The Taste of Fear–Jeremy Bates (See above.)

 

Green Lake–S.K. Epperson (Quite creepy in that stalker kind of way.)

 

Possess–J.A. Howell (This one and the 1st sequel–which isn’t free–will creep you out. After that, the series [ugh] turns into romance [more ugh].)

 

Pure Evil–Jesse Bastide (Horribly disturbing in a get-under-your-skin kind of way.)

 

Rushed–Brian Harmon (Just a great, original horror tale; the world needs more of these!)

 

 

You’re welcome.

 

 

 

Alone Is Better: the Life of Emily Dickinson

I wanted to share an assignment for Warriner’s Grammar and Composition, Third Course that I’m fond of. It’s a paragraph about the life of Emily Dickinson, my hero, because she got rid of people. Let’s face it, with the exception of your parents, no one really has your best interests at heart. People are more trouble than they’re worth, and I’m a notorious loner. You can go ahead and call me the extreme-metal version of Morrissey.

 

I don’t care if nobody reads this blog, either.

 

Here’s the assignment, after I revised and edited it as much as I could:

 

“Alone Is Better: the Life of Emily Dickinson”

 

How could the best poet of all-time have been a recluse? Because she experienced life on a deeper level than those with people around. Some of her loner lifestyle wasn’t her doing. She had many fast-disappearing friends found through family. Eventually, she came to the conclusion that she bore an intensely-lived private life no one else could share or comprehend. Surprisingly, Emily never had the desire to publish her poetry. It was found after her death and published, never to be rivaled by “people who need people who are the luckiest people in the world.”

 

Great Smashwords Deal on My Newest Novel

The Not Smaller Size Image

My newest novel, The Not, is now available on Smashwords.com for $1.50 instead of the usual $2.99. It’s part of a promotion they’re doing called the Summer/Winter Sale, which ends July 31. I’m not sure why it’s also called a “Winter” sale, unless they’re doing the ever-popular “Christmas in July” thing. Anyway, it’s a great time to get a deal on the book I released in December, if you haven’t already read it.

 

Here’s the code to get it for $1.50: SP97D Here’s the link to my profile on Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/AlanRBraun (Copy and paste it into your browser.)

 

It’s a sensational introduction to The Not. And hey, it’s an eBook, so why should you pay too much for it? For the impatient (thanks for your kind and amazing interest in my fiction!), I’m working on getting my next novel published, so I have no idea when it’ll be out. But if I have to self-publish it because of no agent or publisher interest, then it should be available around Halloween. I wish it could be faster. Yet I edit ten times–sometimes more–and of course try to get it published so it will sell well and have a movie version. Anyway, enjoy the sweet deal! I hope you have as good of a time reading my novel as I had writing it!

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